Dreamers know how to snap out of it

We spent Christmas Eve worrying and with our life on pause.

It's no way to live.  And I think that's why when Christmas day arrived, Sam made an announcement that absolutely exploded us from our funk.

Sam: Enough.  We have spent enough time worrying.  If the baby's doing fine, you'll be on the couch.  If it's not fine, we'll be at the hospital.  No more worrying.  We need to live.

He was right.

So, I laid on my couch.  And I tried to laugh more and smile more and worry less.  It seems to be working.

I still have my moments where I get a little nervous, a little scared, but mostly...I feel better.  It is a bit of a state of mind.  So, mind over matter...I'm going to get better.

Determination.  That's what it is.

I keep waiting to swell, but I'm not.  Fingers crossed.  And the baby is moving like crazy as I write.  And I won't know about my blood pressure or protein until Tuesday, so I'm not going to worry about it.  Every day is a day that increases her chances of survival.  At the moment, I refuse to accept any other possibility.

For now, the funk has ended.  And when it returns...and even then only with good reason...I will have all the love and support I need to get through it.